A Bold Foray into Literature

Ok, so maybe not as bold a foray as much as a moment of quiet triumph. I wrote my first article today and posted it online. I wanted to write a piece about how traditional artists bridge the gap into digital art. I think in the end it just wound up being a piece about my thoughts on various "paint" programs out there. Who knows if anyone will find it helpful, let alone read it.

But you never know, someone might. And if I don't take the risk and try, then I'll have let another opportunity to follow my dream pass me by. That's not exactly the lesson I want to be teaching my children. I want them to believe in themselves and fight for their dreams. Best way I know how to do that is to lead by example.

So, I have to get off my duff and actually start putting my money where my mouth is.

It's kind of scary, following a dream. There's the distinct possibility that I'll fail. Another distinct possibility that I'll pass through unnoticed. And the slimmest chance that someone will read my articles, see my artwork, and validate my existence with wads of cash, or praise, or both.

But I'm also afraid of succeeding. Weird, I know, but there it is. I'm afraid that if I succeed and people notice me and what I'm doing, then I'll have to keep doing it, even when I don't feel like doing it any more. I'd have to (shudder) apply myself!

The joy of apathy is that I have the freedom to do whatever I want whenever I want without worrying about disappointing anyone...other than myself. I set my schedule, call the shots, and then pine about how I'm not famous. And I know it's all me, and not some other entity dictating to me that's set me on this course.

But then when I look down into my eldest daughter's eyes and she has nothing but admiration beaming back up at me, and she says in her most sincere voice that I'm the best artist in the whole world...well, I figure I'm letting her down if I don't at least try to make my way in the world.

Oh, I won't let her down if I try and fail. She'll still love me and think my art is wonderful. But I will be letting her down because I'm showing her that it's ok to hide her talent, and to not be disciplined in her art. She and my eldest son are exhibiting artistic talent at their young age. I suspect my youngest two will also follow suit.

So, I bravely took a step forward today and wrote an article. If I don't develop a readership, that's ok. At least I will be teaching my children well.